Man or Rabbit?

Chapter 12 in Part I of
God in the Dock:
Essays on Theology and Ethics
by C.S. Lewis
Man or Rabbit?

“Can’t you lead a good life without believing in Christianity?” This is the question on which I have been asked to write, and straight away, before I begin trying to answer it, I have a comment to make. The question sounds as if it were asked by a person who said to himself, “I don’t care whether Christianity is in fact true or not. I’m not interested in finding out whether the real universe is more what like the Christians say than what the Materialists say. All I’m interested in is leading a good life. I’m going to choose beliefs not because I think them true but because I find them helpful.” Now frankly, I find it hard to sympathise with this state of mind. One of the things that distinguishes man from the other animals is that he wants to know things, wants to find out what reality is like, simply for the sake of knowing. When that desire is completely quenched in anyone, I think he has become something less than human. As a matter of fact, I don’t believe any of you have really lost that desire. More probably, foolish preachers, by always telling you how much Christianity will help you and how good it is for society, have actually led you to forget that Christianity is not a patent medicine. Christianity claims to give an account of facts—to tell you what the real universe is like. Its account of the universe may be true, or it may not, and once the question is really before you, then your natural inquisitiveness must make you want to know the answer. If Christianity is untrue, then no honest man will want to believe it, however helpful it might be: if it is true, every honest man will want to believe it, even if it gives him no help at all.

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I'VE LEARNED

SO TRUE ...

I have learned (author unknown)

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them;
I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back;
I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I’ve learned that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts;
I’ve learned that you can get by on charm, for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something;
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.
I’ve learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I’ve learned that it’s taking me a long time to become the person that I want to be.
I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may b the last time you see them.
I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.
I’ve learned that we are responsible for all we do, no matter how we feel.
I’ve learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I’ve learned that no matter how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take it’s place.
I’ve learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I’ve learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I’ve learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I’ve learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re downhill are the ones to help you get back up.
I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
I’ve learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I’ve learned that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean that they don’t love you with all they have.
I’ve learned that maturity had more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
I’ve learned that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.
I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I’ve learned that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to forgive yourself.
I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I’ve learned that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.
I’ve learned that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I’ve learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will get hurt in the process.
I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.
I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I’ve learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I’ve learned that the people you care about the most in life are taken from you too soon.
I’ve learned that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what you believe.

MY THOUGHTS: IF YOUR BABY IS A COINCIDENCE

(if you feel like trying to reach out makes you loose your dignity - leave it until better times at least)

DISCLAIMER: I am not talking about all men or all women in general, this only touches particular situations and of course there are real men, great fathers, loving husbands and caring boyfriends out there.

I wanted to share some thoughts about situations, which happen quite often, when women get pregnant and it's just an unplanned coincidence. First of all, my advice is: never go for an abortion, you'll find out that every life to be born is a miracle, and you'll be happy that you haven't made a mistake that could never be changed afterwards - never ever.

So, in situations when you have a baby from a man, with whom you have no particular relationship and the only way to get him is to go through lawyers and courts, if there is no opportunity to have a direct, honest conversation with a person looking into each other's eyes - I think it's better to leave it. In times when so many children are getting adopted and find home in families they have no blood connection with and in many cases - happily, it doesn't matter who the biological father is if he is unwilling to take part in his child's life or the only way to get him is through such pain as courts. It's not worth it. There will be a chance to find a real soul mate, and there are many examples when men adopted kids of the woman from previous relationships.

When I was born, my Dad was far away, he only appeared and saw me for the first time when I was over 2 years old, but he wasn't there when my my was pregnant and after she gave birth at all. A few guys were in love with my Mum and proposed to her while my Dad wasn't there and they all were saying to her: "Nina, your baby needs a father, so I can be the one!" Then my Mum married one guy and he was so much in love with my her, he really wanted to adopt me apart from hoping to have his own children of course. And those guys were not some miserable ones or golddiggers, they were descent ambitious and successful.

So we need to live for the beautiful moments of life, rather than dragging into some pointless drama, like going to family courts and begging for financial support. I know, you might think I sound crazy, but listen, I come from the country where majority of women are independent and hard-working, and even when they divorce they manage to bring up the children on their own without taking anything from a man while making their career, it's hard but at least you don't loose self-esteem. There is nothing more important than your dignity, and there is nothing that can stop you from possibly making the same or more money than any man, if you educate yourself and concentrate on achieving your goals. However, it depends what you like more: dedicating your time to having a beautiful date, great sex and being with a person who respects and appreciates you - and if he does, believe me he will feel the same way about your child - or fussing an fighting for some dollars or pounds with a man who don't even care how you feel, wasting your time on somebody who don't deserve it at all.

And if the man who made you pregnant, you have known only briefly, hasn't been there for you at any time, he practically has as much reference to your child as the anonymous man who's sperm you could buy at a sperm bank. Some men (I don't say ALL men) manage to live good life while having unprotected sex without even thinking about further responsibilities. If that ends up in making a baby, it doesn't make them fathers automatically just because they are spreading their seed around the world, it only makes them sperm donors. A child doesn't need a father who doesn't respect his/her mother. As one of my friends in Russia said: "That's not gangsta". Meaning, even real gangstas there don't abandon their kids, don't have to love the woman but take care of the child for sure.

Gone are the times when men and women came together mainly for economical reasons. We need soulmates, with whom we can go a long way with, have times of positive understanding and primarily moral support and respect for each other. Women can be confident, we can make it with or without men, and children are not a burden, they are inspiration.

I know, I am a mother.

JAHNA SEBASTIAN

MY THOUGHTS: THE TRUTH ABOUT HISTORY MAKING

How genius makes it or from nothing to something

Now I wanna talk about understanding of achievements in the light of circumstances given.

"I come from a place where kids are addicted to glue" - that's one of the lines from K'Naan's song "What's hardcore?". That is relevant to Russia too.
When I was locked up I've seen people who have come through some serious offences in this life: I've seen those who were raped, betrayed, lost all their possessing because of war, have been persecuted or unlawfully prosecuted etc. and still they would be looking into the future with their eyes wide open and not losing a positive view. In some countries the most common word you hear is "death" and it's like cleaning your teeth everyday, like watching football.

Let's take two examples. The genius of Bob Marley, who was a boy from a small village in the middle of nowhere in Jamaica, who came all the way from there to become an international Icon, some consider him a prophet. He had to struggle longer than even the period of him finally becoming successful superstar before he died, but the legend will live forever. He became from nothing into one of the most influential people of the last century and even now posthumously. He came from a small poor family in a controversial and at that time very racist society and if you want to talk money - well, his albums are still selling better than some of these chart-floppers of these wannabe pop-stars, who don't even write any of their songs not being particularly talented vocally or artistically either.
Then let's take somebody (not being specific to name) who was lucky enough to have a huge family that was mostly involved in the same industry, born in UK or US, then together they build empire brick by brick, making more and more money and than becoming so money-blind that the only thing left is to boast about how much they have. Now, people born in Jamaica, Somalia or Russia have less opportunities to start with in this world than those born in US or UK, especially if you belong to ethnical minority (that's why it's called so, there's not many people like you) Then sometimes you have to go to another country to survive and get a better chance in life, but start everything from the beginning on your own, being absolutely lonely with NOONE to back you up. Now who has the LONGER WAY TO THE STARS HAS MORE REAL DIGNITY AND RESPECT. There is nothing to boast about if you have been given a relatively easier circumstances to go through than somebody else who had to struggle to get what he has. Now looking at some chain blingers in America and at kids who are war-veterans in Somalia, I can clearly see who is the NATURAL WINNER.

I felt like I'll post an incomplete list of famous refugees:

Moses - fled Egypt after killing a man [subject to belief and historical record]
Jesus - his family fled from Israel because of King Herod [subject to belief and historical record]
Muhammad (PBUH) - fled from Mecca to Medina in 577 [subject to belief and historical record]
Max Born - Nobel Prize for physics - German-Jewish refugee
Albert Einstein - one of the world's most famous scientists - German-Jewish refugee
Alexander Alekhine - chess World Champion, who moved from Communistic Russia to France.
Marlene Dietrich - actress and refugee from Nazi Germany
Peter Carl Fabergé - Russian jeweller, fled Russia via Finland, Germany to Switzerland.
Alfred Wolmark - painter, a Polish-Jewish refugee
Mika -famous singer who fled from Beirut Lebanon .
Wyclef Jean - Haitian refugee. Named group Fugees (short for refugee).
M.I.A. - English-born singer. Part of a Tamil Sri Lankan refugee family
Bob Marley - Fled Jamaica to Miami after being shot during political violence.
K'Naan - Somali "The Dusty Foot Philosopher" Hip Hop Artist now living in Toronto, Canada
Karl Marx - political theorist and German refugee
Leon Trotsky - Marxist theorist, and former member of the Soviet Politburo
Madeleine Albright - former U. S. Secretary of State
Sigmund Freud - Austrian Jew, founded psychoanalysis, he fled from Nazism in Austria
Claude Lévi-Strauss - French-Jewish philosopher and anthropologist. He was a French refugee
Michaëlle Jean - Haitian- The current Governor-General of Canada
Anish Kapoor - won the 1991 Turner Prize. His parents were refugees who fled Iraq.
Sir John Houblon - grandson of refugees. He was the first Governor of the Bank of England
Alek Wek - a supermodel, she fled Sudan with her family
Tanya Sarne - fashion designer and creator of the Ghost label. Her father was a Russian refugee.
Sir Alec Issigonis - designer of the Mini, he was a refugee
Anne Frank - as a child she fled from Nazi Germany to the Netherlands.
Vladimir Nabokov - Russian author and lepidopterist. Escaped to Europe from the Russian Civil War and then to the United States from the advance of Nazi Germany.

Even though some of these people might not have made as much money as 50 Cent, or some of the little kids next door would know Souljaboy better, the contribution of the first to the global history can't be valued with money or underestimated.
We need to understand that people who have really made history, I would say every real leader has been at some point very low and powerless, when those who had no moral right abused or offended them just because it seemed they had more lawful or money power. This life has ups and downs and practically the STRONGER AND MORE HISTORY USEFUL THE PERSON IS THE BIGGER THE CONTRAST IS IN DIFFERENT TIMES IN HIS/HER LIFE.

The same way this refers to those who got something too easily - don't be too overwhelmed with illusions, nothing material lasts forever, even your physical life on earth.
The history also shows, how leaders have been abandoned by the most useless hypocrites in hard times, than only to trade places of both sides so revenge was impossible to avoid, but it was too late for those hypocrites to apologize ... The History is a joker too.



Peace n Harmony

THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY DO ...

I just saw this on RealTalkNY:

The Baltimore Examiner obtained surveillance footage of teenagers laughing while a 46-year-old man is robbed at gunpoint and then shot in a Chinese carry out. Two teens have been charged as adults, but the rest will probably not be charged for their callous attitude. Detectives told Luke Broadwater that shopkeepers continued taking orders and serving customers while the man bled on their floor, refusing him shelter behind the counter.

FULL STORY

This is crazy, in this time and age we are supposed to be moving forwards, or it seems some people evolute back to monkey level? There are tough areas, I've seen some craziness going on. BUT. I have to say, when some people are trying to get explanations to things like that saying: "They were drug dealers, now they got now choice, too much pressure on them, so they have to rob". No matter how poor you are, there is ALWAYS an alternative. Especially in developed countries like US and UK. Education will open your eyes on better things in life. You don't have to want all the bling-bling all at once. There is a more positive way, if those guys at least went to college, they wouldn't end up selling drugs in the first place, even in these times of world crisis there is always a way to keep yourself on top of things. What a wasted life - hustling drugs, robbing, then - prison, then after serving the time, everything starts again in the same circle. Or read some books, take some course, find out what you might be good at in this life, get a job, you gotta start somewhere, nobody can be the boss straight away, then after you get some experience - start your own business. That way when you are 50 you'll probably be retiring on your villa in Spain instead of going back and forth from prison to outside world when your kids - if you ever have any - will hate you, swear at you, and probably follow your footsteps. There is no point to this. If you want to - you CAN get out. Just open your eyes. Some of my friends used to be part of Russian mafia back in the days, and that's not some local thugs, those guys were seriously controlling the whole areas in Moscow back in the 90's. They all have grown up now and found God and a goal in there life. The goal is - to master what your are good at and achieve the best results and make a positive impact into your community. Peace & Blessings

girls strippin down promotion - where is R.E.S.P.E.C.T.?

While I am watching most of the music videos created these days, I think to myself: "why and who needs this promotion of women as strippers and prostitutes and why do girls don’t respect themselves enought to get involved in that?" Sometimes, you look at a picture and see a girl in bikini or almost nude and your might think that she’s a model or something and than you find out that she is an "upcoming singer". Then you happen to meet these type of dudes who are telling you: "all that sells in the music business now is sex, that’s the way to success, doesn’t matter if you can actually sing!" Then I remember the words of one guy who’s married to a very beautiful model-like lady with very very long and perfect shape legs (all men just get crazy looking at her) when he said that when you see all that every day showing off, at first you get used to it, than you stop noticing and even get tired and then it’s not that attractive to you anymore, if there’s nothing behind it, i e soul beauty.

Some artists strip down when they don’t need to, because they are blessed with some talent and people will still go and buy their cd’s or concert tickets if they don’t do that. Come on, guys, it should be all about music? then in many commercial hiphop videos (I’m talking about MTV, but that’s what the kids are gettin their hands on) you see naked or almost naked girls surrounding one not always cute dude, shakin their naked booties into the cameras and doin whateva ... I mean, it’s great if you can shake your booty and it’s beautiful if you are actually dancing and doing it well especially to certain types of music, and I do shake my booty in the clubs (dancing!), but there is a difference between a dance and a strip tease or porno. A whole bunch of artists singin and rappin about girls who are strippers and prostitutes as if it’s a normal job for a woman after hundred years of women’s struggle to be accepted equal to men in their rights such as getting education, persue a career in anything just like any man would, voting etc. Why? then when I saw Kanye West video for "Flashin Lights", I was shocked by this strange conception of this weird girl taking her clothes of and then murdering a guy in the car, this is not healthy, I mean we have that in life, just watch any Russian TV channel news programe (if you speak Russian) and you will see this violance as an everyday life. Lack of love, violance and then somebody’s still asking why there are guns and knives in the hands of kids in the streets these days? If the kids see all these strippers and most successful artists rappin about women as "b$tches and hoes" and relationships built on money, HOW KIDS ARE GOING TO FIND OUT ABOUT LOVE? And if you are actually singin about love, you don’t need to do it while undressing yourself, there other creative ways of expressing an idea of L.O.V.E. whatever it is, strippin down or prostitution, it’s just about business based on men’s weekness when lookin at a naked girl. And at the same time these type of men (not all men) who are actually talking about cash-relationships are the greediest ones. I have been told so many times "you should go and do what everybody does now, sex sells!" Well, I think, sex sells for a short period of time and LOVE sells FOREVER. I have never seen Lauryn Hill do dirty things, but her album "Miseducation ..." is a classic and I have never seen it on the shelves in charity shops for 50p like some other "successful at a time" artists’ cd’s, because most people would keep it in their collection. Real music stays forever. Bob Marley’s music is known at least a little bit to almost everyone in the world, unless you have lived in a fishtank for your whole life.

Sex is good and important, but not when it sells. Sex is a form of showing love to somebody, getting to know that person you like. Even if you have sex on a first date (don’t get me wrong, but anything can happen), if a girl agreed to it becuase she liked the guy that much, she’s not a prostitute or a whore. When you actually do it because of your feelings, that’s natural and we’re all human. But if you do it with intention to squeeze a bit of cash out of it, that’s a different story. Ok, there have always been people doing this and prostitution is one of the most ancient proffessions, but it should not be raised to a normal way of life. It should stay where it is in it’s own place not promoted by "every day new pop idols" to the new generation.
But after all, today, when women are absolutely equal to men in most parts of the world by law, girls forget about it and misuse their beauty for temporary satisfaction of men’s ego. When you can go, get a Degree, choose any proffession and persue a career, and yes, make your own money by working hard and achieving your dreams. And when you get older you would not be ashamed to look into your kids’ eyes and tell them what you’ve been doing. But who needs this promotion of women acting like stupid sex machines designed to work until you’re broke? All I’m asking is for a little R.E.S.P.E.C.T.!